I’ve been doing a nightly positive thinking meditation podcast (don't worry, I hate me too) so I’ve been spending much of my day trying to turn my negative thoughts into positive thoughts..
Tell me how I’m doing..
While laying in bed in the morning I thought, “I may never be successful”. I positively spun it into, “I’m positive all this hard work is all for naught and I’m POSITIVE I will definitely succeed at being the opposite of successful”.
See what I did there? I added the word positive twice, used the swanky term, all for naught (and I also said it in a british accent) for some flair and I used the word definitely instead of never.
When stuck at a never-ending red light I thought, “This is the longest light in the whole wide world, I’m never going to get to where I need to be and I’m going to die here in my car”. I switched that to, “Wow, this light is so thorough... she is really taking her time to make this the best light transition from Red to Green in all of the intersections in LA. I admire her work ethic, and strive to be more like this stop light”.
While at an audition, I looked around and thought, “I’m old”. I quickly changed this to, “There are some people who are younger than me and then there are some people who are older than me, and they are gonna die before me. Unless something weird or unexpected happens… but if it’s an old-age thing, I will probably live longer. However there are many cases where people outlive others.. like my nana who smoked every day and she lived way longer than my other grandmother who was clean as a whistle. So, nothing really matters”.
When at the gym I thought, “I’m fat”. Then while drowning in my own sweat on the stair climber I flipped it into the thought, “I’m a full figured flower who should embrace her curves...although hollywood won’t...but some people will embrace it… but those people don’t matter… but they matter to someone… so… I’m not fat? I’m not fat”.
When on Facebook, looking at everyone’s pregnant, baby, wedding, engagement, etc photos I thought, “My eggs are going to die and I’m going to die alone” … and I put a positively positive spin on this by thinking, “Kids ruin your life... so eggs, freeze away! And I WILL die alone BUT happy without a fat, snoring man to suck my soul.”
And after brushing my teeth, and snuggling into bed I thought, “I’m a loser… but I'm the biggest loser… so I WIN”!
I think the power of positive thinking is working for me!